As we approach the third week of Lent, we start to look some exacting statements which those in recovery are asked to make. There is no timeframe in which they are required to go through all of the steps. They go at their pace; nevertheless, they are encouraged to reflect on each stage and move on – for to not complete the 12 steps may well impact upon their progress towards full and sustained recovery.
Where does that place us? Do we feel there is any urgency or a requirement to complete a phase of reflection in our life as a Christian? Have we already made it?
The next 3 steps are as follows:
(4) Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
(5) Admit to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
(6) Be entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
How do these steps resonate with you? Are they as difficult as I see them?
For those in recovery, that ‘inventory’ may include all of their life prior and possibly including their time in recovery. They may have spent time in prison, time on the streets; made some decisions in life which they now regret. It might also be a time to look back and reconsider exactly what they have done, and been like. No small task.
They are then asked to speak to God, their higher power, however they see God, but also to another human, and tell them exactly what they have done wrong. Does this seem akin to priestly confession? This phase for recovering addicts may take some time, as during this explanation, they may return to certain periods of time, to explore further issues. What issues might make us reticent to engage with this step ourselves?
Finally, there is that trust that God, however they see God, can and will remove these defects of character from them.
Three-fold illness
They see addiction as a three-fold illness: physical, mental and spiritual.
The physical illness is one that once they take that substance, it sets up a desire for more and more. It is insatiable. They believe that the conclusion to this will be death. It is that black and white. We might speak of sin leading to death (Romans 6:23); do we believe this to be true for us?
The mental illness is one of depression, that their ability to rationally reflect on their issues is sufficiently impacted that they are not able to continue. Their mental thought process is so inhibited that they are unable to break out of the vicious cycle.
The spiritual illness is one that the only way to have the power sufficient to sustain recovery is to trust in their higher power. However, they perceive this power, it is the lifeblood, the one that they call upon in the morning, throughout the day and at night. It is that void in their body, their life, which allows them to move forward.
John 5
When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?” “Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.
The man had to have that desire to get well. It wasn’t a passing wish, he expresses a history of unfulfilled need, until Jesus speaks to him. There is that expectation of healing, if only he could get into that water. And he is healed; a dramatic healing. There is life afterwards, potential to re-enter society and get employment, after such a long time of being shunned and marginalised.
How does this relate to our lives?
Some questions:
Confession is somewhat anachronistic today; when was the last time you heard it? Would we ever do this to a minister, or a trusted individual, or God?
What scares us of our true nature? Often our lives are so busy that we might fail to pause and reflect not on what we do but who we are. Hence, we may not have time to reflect on our ‘true nature’. Those attributes of our life, our character which underpins what we do.
Do we see sin as a black mark against us, or its removal as a means of flourishing within community? Moreover, where’s our focus here: on sin or flourishing? When someone has admitted a mistake, can we move on and allow them to flourish or perpetually recall what they have done?
Conclusions
What might it cost for an addict to prepare an inventory of all that they did wrong, and likewise for us? Ouch I think that is a hard question to end with. Why is that?
There are things in my past, the full details of which I could never reveal to anyone but God.
Sime might say that as we vocalise our thoughts we hear it possibly for the first time. If we could say what we’ve done in the past we might realise it’s real significance. If those in anonymous do confide this to their sponsor, it’s not a confession but a way of understanding of the transformation from addict to being in recovery.
And that’s ok. But in acknowledging those details, that they exist, is one way in which we can start to make progress.
Those in addiction recovery can take many months on this step alone, to come to an understanding of what has happened and the implications.
Additionally, their belief in God may well differ to those of a Christian. Their understanding may be one of a force of love, or the fellowship of people. Just as we can’t describe one image of God that all Christians can agree with, let’s permit a greater vaguity with their description of God, as they understand him/her/them.