Doubt

“This is Trinity Sunday, but society doesn’t care really. This is Trinity Sunday, but it doesn’t pay the bills. “But, this is Trinity Sunday,” is states on the Plan. Even so, for many our world doesn’t care or understand. The Church whose building is being disposed of, they may not care. Does it really matter to them that God is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit? They just want to know that God is God and that God somehow knows who they are, where they are, what they are doing, and what they need.” 

adapted from Feasting on the Word: Year A, Volume 3: Pentecost and Season After Pentecost 1 (Propers 3-16).”

We have 11 disciples going up a mountain. The mountains were always considered a theophany, a place to find God. Where do we find God? Is it in a particular room at home, or by a loch, or, for me, in McDonalds – you’ll understand later. For Matthew, or whoever it was who wrote Matthew’s Gospel, he wanted to portray Jesus akin to the Moses of old. Moses would not enter the promised land, and Jesus, having died and returning to life, leaves before it all gets going. As Moses went up a mountain, so does Jesus. Moses speaks of a new place where they will all go, as does Jesus. I wonder how this all sounded to Jews who, following the failed uprising in 70AD in Jerusalem, the retribution from the Romans, the diaspora – the dispersal from their homelands to the four winds, the dispersal of Jews to the four winds – to Egypt, Turkey and Italy and further down the Mediterranean coastline. They must have thought that Israel was their promised land…

Do you doubt? I do…

There is mention of the disciples who doubt. Do you get that feeling? Surely during the last month with Revelation we may have doubted the sanity of John or perhaps our understanding of the Bible with all those visions of beats, dragons, fire breathing prophets and horses running amok. 

We might struggle with many parts of the Bible, but then again, it was written in different circumstances to us, to different people, and we may not be sure of the reasons that the letter or whatever was actually written. We can be sure that they, like us, may have had doubts. Just think of Thomas for example. 

So it seems that it is ok. Having doubts is alright. There is room for those that question. We don’t have to have full 100% assurance in the Gospel.

Dunamis or Exousia??

 Jesus states that he has the authority. Do you recall when Jesus and the Devil went up a mountain? A metaphorical journey in the wilderness, exploring key aspects such as authority and power. This authority Jesus claims is not through power or domination but love, vulnerability, sacrifice. Jesus has power but not the usual one mentioned in the Gospels. The word usually is dunamis – what we use for dynamite – something explosive where the power is self-contained, held within. Jesus uses the word exousia, passed on, not domination but sharing what is needed – equipping.  Transformative power. All, yes even those who doubt, the waverers, the not exactly completely sure, all have the commission to go out and make disciples – equipped. Interestingly, and the Church might wish to take note of this over the millennia, Jesus tells us to live as he lived and not say believe as he believed. Our church policy in the past is to ensure that everyone believes in what we believe, for if we say the Jesus prayer, if we say what the leaders say, we are all ok. That’s not sharing, that’s power. We are called to live as Jesus lived, and allow others to engage with that. It might make the commission to all a bit more understandable, manageable even. 

Are we here to save the Church, did Jesus mention the Church? He said go and make disciples – church – wherever we are, just live that life God has given you, and if we doubt, you are amongst friends who also doubt – but still live that life: show God’s love wherever you are.