Nike : Just Do it

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We are over the hill, on our way down from the summit. Week 4 of 6, with Easter approaching, and we have Steps 7, 8 and 9 in our sights now. Please recall that such a process for a recovering addict may not just be a few weeks. It’s that critical to them.

The 3 steps this week are:

(7) Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

(8) Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

(9) Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Whereas Step 6 was to be entirely ready for God to remove those deflects of our character, not wishing to maintain a hold upon them, Step 7 goes one stage further. Remove them. Do it now.

Following that exacting inventory, the recovering addict is asked to go further and make a list of all those they have harmed. Oh and also be willing to make amends. That’s more than just say sorry, or to cross them off that list as past wrongs – but go the full hog. It is akin to Matthew 5:40: if someone wants to take you to court to gain your shirt, give them your coat as well.

What does ‘make amends to them all’ might mean to you?

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But we have a safety clause here: “except when to do so would injure them or others.” How might this offer us a way of maintaining our own wellbeing when we have been injured or hurt? Can we think of circumstances where this might apply?

Luke 15: 18-24

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I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ “Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

There is that initial realisation of what the son had done wrong, a need to take action. He decides that he must go to his Father. I wonder what he thought on the way there, was his father going to be receptive? We might often jump to conclusions that the response will be the most extreme, negative, whereas we might wish to consider a rationale middle response.

We can see that as the response from the father was one of celebration. Something I see at the regular anonymous birthday parties, celebrating that persons’ anniversary of sobriety . It could be weekly, monthly and then annually – all a celebration.

Questions:

How difficult do we find it to humbly ask for forgiveness? And to be willing to make amends?… Saying sorry can be one of those brief things we do. When you bump into someone on the train platform, or block them when getting across the road – but really saying sorry for what we have done which has really hurt them??

We might also reflect upon our boundaries. We can seek forgiveness with all we have hurt but what if it so affects our own wellbeing that, mentally, we feel crushed.

Conclusion

How might we struggle with this, perhaps because forgiveness has often inferred total vulnerability?

5 thoughts on “Nike : Just Do it

  1. But what if, no matter how sorry you are, the person to whom you are apologising doesn’t want to forgive you, or to have anything more to do with you?

    1. That’s their issue not yours. It isn’t a transaction, a quid pro quo, a deal. You release that burden from within yourself. How the wife of the perceived IRA informer today can forgive the killers of her husband, (in the news today in the UK) is one just example

  2. Hi Bob,I am every good friend of Eileen and Craig Martin.I saw you at Eileen’s church at the start of the year.I have been following what you have done and achieved in your life so far.Very impressed.I enjoy reading your thoughts,it’s a pity the world doesn’t have more people like yourself.Eileen tells me you are leaving Scotland soon, it will be real miss to the circuit.Hope you and your family continue to have a good life together.

    1. Thank you Danny for your words. We are hoping not to leave Scotland – yous have all convinced us not to leave this wonderful place. It just might be in Dumfries and Galloway. Here’s hoping

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